I went for penitental service last night. As usual I reflected all the sins that I have commited, and the more I reflect, the more I feel so bad. I have failed God so badly as a Catholic.
By the time comes to my turn, I confessed my sins, rattling them like a grocery shopping list. Once I'm done, I waited for the priest to say something.
It was the least expected reply I would have expected from him.
"God is merciful and forgiving. What you need to do is to forgive yourself."
What a revelation!
I admitted to him that it was a burden after all, and those advice was exactly what I needed.
Jesus died on the cross to save us from sin. Although the emphasis on the Sacraments of Reconciliation is to receive graces from God, I guess my focus was just to confess my sins hoping that I would be pardoned, not knowing that God has already forgiven my sins! He loves us, even though we are sinners.
I was very glad to have gone for confession that day. I know some church denominations, or even some Catholics themselves do not believe the Sacrements of Reconciliation, but after today's experience, sometimes it's not just to confess sins or to receive grace, but you may actually get to hear God's message and then suddenly all becomes light and bright again.
"Dear God, I thank you for speaking to me in the most unexpected way, to remind me that you will always be an ever loving and merciful God, and that I need to love and forgive myself more because I am already forgiven. I believe you are my one and only God, and I will serve you as far as I live. I offer up my prayer that more people will be touched by your love through the Sacrements of Reconciliation. In Jesus' name, Amen"
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